The Bird

My parents have this bird.  Its name is Bob.  It was a little guy when they got it.  It was spoiled excessively by my mom.  She made him birdie cereal for breakfast every morning.  He ate at the dining room table with her.  Like I said, excessively spoiled.  One day while Mom was away at a meeting, Bob was eating at the table with us and he flew over to my shoulder.  I wasn't too keen on the bird, but I allowed him to stay.  Then the little snot bit the ever livin' pee-wadins' out of my ear.  I screamed...you might say that I was a little dramatic, maybe that is where my daughter gets it?!?!?!  Dad, who was two chairs over, reached over and thumped the little twit. 


It was one of those dad thumps.  The ones that hurt like crazy when you are being too loud in church.  You can ask my brother, he knows all about those.  What is it about those dad thumps?  Is it a prerequisite before becoming a dad to know how to perform these thumps?  Or is it just because all the men in my life have strong hands, therefore a strong thump? 


So the spoiled birdie got a thump.  He was put back in his cage and not allowed back out until Mom came home.  She tried to let him out several times but every time he was given the chance, he wouldn't behave and would have to go back.  He is a funny bird.  Sometimes he is good and sings and talks and lets you rub his head.  Then there are days that he wakes up on the wrong side of the perch.  You know to stay away from him on those days.  He will try to bite you and if you try to spoil him with a carrot or other treat he will grab it and then throw it on the floor.  He is a very temperamental bird. 

He stays in my parents office and can mimic the telephone really well.  And Dad's sneeze.  And he whistles. 

The bird was Dad's deal.  He used to have a bird years ago.  He had to get rid of it when I was born.  Maybe that's why the bird bit me?!?!  While he is a different bird than what Dad had before maybe he had heard through the grapevine of my evil ways.  Hmmmm...interesting. 

Is there such thing as bad birdie karma? 

Carrie